The Quill and Me—Devotional Blog•Oswald Chambers Reflections 

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November 28
Personal Testimony
Forgiving Myself
1 Peter 4:8
"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins."

Forgiveness and Self-Love

Forgiveness is not only about releasing others—it is about releasing ourselves. For years, I carried regret over choices I made, wishing I had known then what I know now. But God sees the heart, and His mercy reminds me that self-love is not selfish. It is honoring the life He gave me, setting boundaries, and refusing to be treated less than His beloved child.
When we forgive ourselves, we step into freedom. We stop carrying the weight of yesterday and begin walking in the grace of today.

Forgiveness Continues: Learning to Release Myself

I’ve learned that the hardest person to forgive is myself.

For years, I put other people’s wants and needs before my own. I didn’t know about self-love, boundaries, or the importance of respecting myself. I trusted too easily, gave too freely, and believed love could conquer all. Those choices shaped my life.

But the past is behind me. It cannot be changed. What matters now is how I live today. 

I’ve discovered that self-love is not selfish—it is necessary. It means setting boundaries, refusing to be treated badly, and caring for myself so I can care for others. At 67, I’m still learning this, and it isn’t easy. I’ve realized: others will treat you the way you allow them to.

So I’m practicing forgiveness—not just toward others, but toward myself. I’m learning to stop blaming myself for being trusting, kind, and hopeful. Those qualities are not weaknesses; they are strengths. And while the world may judge me, I know the Lord sees my heart.

Forgiveness, for me, is about releasing the weight of regret and choosing to walk in mercy, boundaries, and self-respect. It’s about putting up the “Stop Sign” sooner, before I’m pushed into a corner.

Prayer

Lord, thank You for teaching us that forgiveness begins with love—
Help us release the weight of past mistakes 

and see ourselves as You see us: 

beloved, redeemed, and whole.
Give us courage to set boundaries that honor You, 

wisdom to walk away from harm, 

and grace to forgive ourselves.
In Jesus' name, Amen.

Blessing:

May you walk in the freedom of forgiveness, carrying no burden of regret, but only the light of God’s mercy. May your boundaries be strong, your heart tender, and your spirit ever hopeful.

Walking in faith and forgiveness,
~ Quil

Update: July  

A Later Reflection on "Self" and Christ's Lordship 

I have since learned that self-love is not the correct word for what I am learning. I learned that "self" was my biggest problem. I should be turned to Christ—not self. Self should not rule my world, Christ Himself should rule my world. I have given Him the "Self" that was ruling over my life and He is now the steward of it. I have since learned to protect my boundaries, even while respecting others, and to place my peace before others' wants and demands. I am walking a new path. Following Christ. I must not let the world or others distract me or destroy my peace and the relationship I am building with the Lord, my God.

My body is His temple. He sits on the throne of my life. His will is my choice. If something enters into my life that was not sent by Him, does not glorify Him, does not deepen my relational walk with Him... then I need to discern what to do about it. I must make the choice that protects my peace. Protects my relationship with Him. I must walk in truth and honesty before His throne at all times. 

About "self"... I surrendered my life to Christ in April. I could not fix self, self and sin were my problem. Self, sin, pride, ego... they all needed to be handed over to the only One who could "fix" them. Jesus Christ. The Holy Spirit of Christ who dwells within me has since given me a new outlook on self and boundaries, among other things. He is currently restoring order to my inner world... which includes "self." 

I invite you to come along on this 365 day journey and read about all I am learning from God about His kingdom. Start here on day one of the journey to reach your full potential and gain all the insights from this spiritual growth journey: Bold for Christ in the New Year

You may want to read this devotional... 

from the April 3rd Oswald Chambers reflection:

 The Strange God: Self

Note: I wrote "Forgiveness and Self-Love" during an earlier season, before I began this 365 day spiritual journey, and I’m leaving it here because it is part of my story. It was the road that led me to the crossroads where I began this new journey. Since then, God has deepened my understanding of what it means to care for the body and life He entrusted to me. I no longer use the phrase “self‑love” the way I once did; today I see it more clearly as stewardship—honoring God with His temple. Thank you for walking with me as I grow. And thank you for your understanding and patience as I walk this new path. 

~ Quil

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Scripture References

1 Peter 4:8 — Love covers a multitude of sins.
Psalm 103:12 — God removes our sins far from us.
Isaiah 43:18–19 — Do not dwell on the past; God is doing a new thing.
Romans 8:1 — No condemnation for those in Christ Jesus.
Matthew 11:28 — Jesus gives rest to the weary and burdened.
Proverbs 4:23 — Guard your heart; it directs your life.
Galatians 2:20 — “I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.”
1 Corinthians 6:19–20 — Your body is God’s temple; honor Him with it.
Psalm 34:18 — The Lord is close to the brokenhearted.
James 4:7 — Submit to God; resist what does not belong in your life.